Improve your position. This mantra for success is something people forget every day. When you get up in the morning and keep doing the same thing, you end up in the same position at the end of every day.
Fear. When you think about it, the real root cause of doing the same thing every day is the fear of the unknown. Fear of leaving your comfort zone. Fear of not making that next car payment. Fear of missing time with your friends, fear of losing time with your co-workers.
There is always that one person though. That one person that takes a little time away from the group. There is always that one person that moves out and up. That person that you watch and wonder why it wasn't you.
The secret? Improve your position.
There is more to it though. In order to improve your position, you need to define "improve". How do you know what improvement is if you don't have a destination? The key is to create a vision or destination that is a very clear vision of where you are going. When you have that vision you can improve your position.
In simple terms, if you want to go to the park at the end of the block, and your neighbor asks you to watch the game, are you getting closer to the park? If you want that new car, and your friend calls with tickets to the concert that cost $100, does the concert get you closer to the new car.
These are obvious examples. The most difficult involve an overload of information. The secret to speed in improving your position is filtering out the chaff or useless information.
Simple decisions can hold you back if you don't pay attention, or pay too much attention to the chaff instead of the important points.
Living life with a purpose means having a "mission" in everything you do. Even on vacation you can have a "mission" or "purpose". It might only be to "relax". Everyone needs to recharge from time to time, and that means different things to different people. For me it means turning off the office and work in the front of the brain and letting the back 90% do it's job. For other people it is just to get the family "off their back".
How can you improve your position while on vacation? The reality is that you can always practice cutting through the chaff, even while traveling. Always listening will bombard you with a lot of useless information, and it might just get you that great idea or solve the problem you have been having at the office.
Every time you get a call, ask yourself, "Does this improve my position or put me into a position where I can improve my position?" If it doesn't, learn to say "no" if you want to move ahead.
Showing posts with label success keys. Show all posts
Showing posts with label success keys. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 26, 2014
Monday, February 10, 2014
What Are The Real Keys To Success?
As you know, I have been trying to fine tune the "formula for success" so that more people can create a lifestyle that they want, not just one they settle for.
I want to help you find a better way to live your life that fits you. You can't be me and I can't be you, but we are both human and so the rules must be similar.
Recently I found the book was worth adding to my reading list for my clients and sharing with you.
The book is Cal Newport's "Be So Good They Can't Ignore You". Cal Newton argues that chasing your dreams is a waste of time. I agree. You can have all the passion in the world for something but if the world doesn't it want it that way from you, you will go broke.
Like many people there are several things that I am passionate about. I accept that those passions will not provide me sufficient income to maintain the lifestyle I expect. Instead those passions are my hobbies.
What he says to do is act like Steve Jobs at Apple. Steve created a bunch of products and saw what worked and what didn't and he kept fine tuning based on the feedback of the market. Remember the Newton? Even the original iPhone (or should we call it the "Classic" now?) wasn't really much to speak up. The bugs weren't worked out until the iPhone 3G.
Do the same thing in life. Pursue a bunch of things and when you find one you like and that the market keeps asking your for, become great at it.
One of the aspects I really enjoy about blogging is the feedback from the market. It doesn't matter how many people comment on my blog, Facebook page or Twitter feed. When they do, I always appreciate it and try to respond in kind.
The metric that I really like however for blogs are the number of reads, and the number of reposts. It's very easy to see what people want to hear about from me when I look at those metrics. When I write about flying airplanes the scores are dismal. When I write about building a business or real estate empire the graph shoots off the page. There is no question what people want me to write about.
If you are at a crossroads, or stuck on a plateu, keep visiting this blog, or check out our new jumpstart program opening in March.
I want to help you find a better way to live your life that fits you. You can't be me and I can't be you, but we are both human and so the rules must be similar.
Recently I found the book was worth adding to my reading list for my clients and sharing with you.
The book is Cal Newport's "Be So Good They Can't Ignore You". Cal Newton argues that chasing your dreams is a waste of time. I agree. You can have all the passion in the world for something but if the world doesn't it want it that way from you, you will go broke.
Like many people there are several things that I am passionate about. I accept that those passions will not provide me sufficient income to maintain the lifestyle I expect. Instead those passions are my hobbies.
What he says to do is act like Steve Jobs at Apple. Steve created a bunch of products and saw what worked and what didn't and he kept fine tuning based on the feedback of the market. Remember the Newton? Even the original iPhone (or should we call it the "Classic" now?) wasn't really much to speak up. The bugs weren't worked out until the iPhone 3G.
Do the same thing in life. Pursue a bunch of things and when you find one you like and that the market keeps asking your for, become great at it.
One of the aspects I really enjoy about blogging is the feedback from the market. It doesn't matter how many people comment on my blog, Facebook page or Twitter feed. When they do, I always appreciate it and try to respond in kind.
The metric that I really like however for blogs are the number of reads, and the number of reposts. It's very easy to see what people want to hear about from me when I look at those metrics. When I write about flying airplanes the scores are dismal. When I write about building a business or real estate empire the graph shoots off the page. There is no question what people want me to write about.
If you are at a crossroads, or stuck on a plateu, keep visiting this blog, or check out our new jumpstart program opening in March.
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
Should You Quit And Follow Your Passion?
Quitting everything and going after your dream is the subject of dozens of books. As a business owner and industry leader many other business owners wanted to duplicate my success and would ask me how to do it.
To be truthful, I have told many people that they had to find their own dream and pursue it. They couldn’t be me, my dreams, mission and goals are mine and mine alone. Many people have paid me for advice, and until now, I was overlooking two pieces of key information in the formula.
Cal Newport also points out that you might get lucky and find that your dream is also financially rewarding, but that is rarely the case. When you explore the lives of people we call “successful” in both life and financial rewards, he noted that they did several different things, and went with one that worked and became the best at that "thing".
Looking back over my successes and not so much successes, it is clear that success is much more a simple formula than I ever gave credit for. Pilot? I got pretty good at it, and people pay for it. Both keys here. Business developer and consultant? Yes people pay well for what I have learned and my knowledge in their business. Both keys here Actor? people are starting to buy it, so I’ll probably do more, have a market that will pay, only have some skills and have a plan to improve them. Athlete? Clearly a market, but I never got the skills to a salable level. Musician? Ditto.
To be truthful, I have told many people that they had to find their own dream and pursue it. They couldn’t be me, my dreams, mission and goals are mine and mine alone. Many people have paid me for advice, and until now, I was overlooking two pieces of key information in the formula.
I have to give credit where credit is due, because I have been taking this for granted instead of making sure everyone understood these keys to success. Cal Newport in his book “So Good They Can’t Ignore You”, pointed out something that was right there all along and I was glancing over it.
There is a bit of irony here since I am taking a hosting and interviewing class right now from Marki Costello, and just about everyone in the class will glance right past the “bombshells” and go for the “safe” route. This is exactly what happens in business. As entrepreneurs we get caught up in our mission and forget to listen to the market.
Some time ago another entrepreneur friend told me “You have to keep a lot of irons in the fire, and go with the ones that get hot.” At the time it didn’t make much sense, and it is still not advice I would give everyone, but Cal Newport puts it a better way that makes sense to me, and is worth passing on.
The First Key
The foundation of any endeavor that requires financial success as part of the grade has to first pass the test of the market. Simply put, you must do something people will pay you for. It doesn’t matter how good you are, if there isn’t a market need, and you can’t convince people that they have one, you can be the greatest, and still be broke.
Lets face it, money does matter. In a way it should right? Society rewards us with money for solving their problems, not ours. When you solve your problems you relieve a little stress, when you solve societies problems you are rewarded with money and power. That isn’t selling out, that is being real.
The Second Key
The two keys together provide and an interesting insight, that was sitting right in front of me. I had been skipping right over it all along, and yet it is exactly why my residential technology business did well in California, and only average to boring in Texas. The market wasn’t as willing to pay for the technology in Texas no matter how good I (an my company) was. In California I had both the market and the skills, in Texas, it was mostly just idle skills.
Instead of looking at it as putting many irons in the fire at once, I think this is more like putting an iron in the fire, branding the cow, and seeing if anyone will buy the brand. If not, get another iron and try again. If they do, get really good at making that brand better.
This is why truly successful people can have many successful ventures. Richard Branson comes to mind here. Once one Iron got hot and everyone liked the brand, he built it up and used that to buy the next iron. While we all know the brands that stuck, records, airlines and cell phones, I am sure there are just as many or more that didn’t take and we never heard of.
At the end of the day, Cal Newport is right. Trying to become a Rockstar just ended in misery, I was in love with the dream, not the product and process so I never attained the skill level needed for my brand to sell. Practicing chords and notes made me nuts. In business, flying and acting, for whatever reason I don’t have any problem pushing to new limits every time I go to work. I like building the skills and thus obtained the second key.
If you have been chasing your passion and it feels like you are chasing your tail, Cal’s book might help you get on the right track.
Monday, December 23, 2013
Are You Doing Your Homework To Succeed?
Doing "homework" is something most people try to stop doing the minute they leave school. That is exactly why most people don't "make it". The reality is that "homework" is probably the second most important key to success right after "purpose".
This week I had a great conversation with Alan Pietruszewski about acting, and the level of effort and training required to become even a good actor, let alone great. Much like flying jets, you just can't walk in and do it well. Alan is a friend and a mentor of mine.
As an actor, I know I have been very lucky and fallen into some great deals. That did not mean I was the best I could be or even what the director wanted. More than once I am sure they felt like they were "stuck" with me because I was the only choice they had. Alan teaches a class for actors who are vets. I haven't taken the classes but I am fortunate enough to get some one on one time with him on occasion.
Along the lines of learning how to do your homework, a book I recommend to everyone is "Boyd". It is the story of the man that changed how we fight wars, and yet few even knew he existed. Boyd's signature statement was, "I am ready, I did my homework". If you don't do your homework, you aren't ready for any job. Even McDonalds' has training to make sure the right number of pickle slices end up on the bun every time.
Doing your "homework" was the focus of AlanPietruszewski's last class.
Doing your homework is the first step in a commitment to excellence. I am very fortunate to live in an area of very successful people. I can do homework in business just by talking to my neighbors and friends. I can do this because I made a conscious decision to be a little "house poor". I buy the least expensive house in the most expensive area I can afford. I do this because I find that being low man on the financial totem pole, affords me many more opportunities to learn and grow.
Being the big fish in a small pond is garbage thinking. You can't grow if the pond won't support you. I remember once hearing that a certain fish can only grow so that it is 1" for each gallon in the tank. The bigger the tank the bigger the fish could get. I want to be that fish and so should you.
Starting out as the smallest fish in a big pond gives you many more opportunities to learn and grow. It also makes it easier to do your homework. Your potential is unlimited, so why limit it by living in a small pond? Yes a big fish might eat you, but you will only get eaten when you give up the fight. Lets face it, big fish are lazy and will just go after the next fish, they really don't want to fight.
Living where I am now, there are dozens of business owners, lawyers, doctors, accountants, and even a musician or two. All of them are successful because they did their homework and keep doing their homework. One guitar player has a studio in his house. I haven't met him yet, but I met his guitar coach while out running. Several platinum albums and he still has a guitar coach every week.
His coach told me that he plays four or five hours every day. That is doing your homework. You owe it to yourself to live the best life you can, and that means doing a little homework today and every day, so that tomorrow is a little better than yesterday.
If you make the most money and have the biggest house in your area, who would you learn from, who would you be inspired by? More importantly, who is inspiring your children, people on MTV or real people they know? Live among the people you want to be like, not among the people that will hold you back.
When you do a little homework every day, you get a little better at being you every day. That "you" will quickly rise to the top of any field. Don't you owe it to yourself?
Wednesday, December 18, 2013
Do You Use "Purpose" In Your Decision Making?
Having "purpose" in decision making is easier said that done. Do you let emotions effect your decisions? If you do, why? Do you even know when you do it? The truth is that we can see it in others more easily than we can see it in ourselves.
Every day I bet you see people that can't make a decision. Ask them where to eat, and nobody will step up with a decision. Ask them what they want after they get there and I'll bet you hear "You go then I'll decide". Are you that person who always "lets" others go first? Don't be.
Eating out is a simple example of how people let fear and emotion get in the way. Nobody wants to offend anyone else by picking the wrong place to eat. If everyone else is eating salads, the indecisive will go along instead of getting the steak and lobster they really want. Why? Fear.
Fear of offending someone.
Fear of not belonging.
Fear of being ridiculed or embarrassed by the choice.
You are probably thinking it sounds funny that we have "fear" about where to eat and what to eat, but people do. When I embarked on a very strict no carb diet to lose 30 pounds last year, I realized how often people put off their decisions to go along with what other people were doing.
I never asked anyone else to eat "low carb" or "no carb" but amazingly I didn't see bread or pasta on the table for over five months. I lost the weight and changed my eating habits for good, and it has made ordering that much easier.
In this case I had a genuine purpose that was important to me. I needed to lose weight because of a knee problem that was developing.
New Years resolutions fail for this exact reason. The resolution isn't that important, it is missing a very solid "what's in it for me". Let take a smoker, who decides to quit and look at it from the "what's in it for me" perspective.
1. If I quit, I won't smell like cigarettes. Is this really important to them? probably not, they haven't been bothered enough by it so far.
2. If I quit, I won't need smoke breaks. Is this important? In fact quite the opposite, the smoke breaks may be an escape that they lose. They might feel like they are offending the other smokers by not joining them.
3. If I quit, I'll save money. This is a good one, but if there isn't something to save for, it won't matter.
4. If I quit, I'll be healthier. This is the one that might work. If they have a genuine purpose to live healthier, they might quit smoking. If they just like the idea of living healthier, it isn't a purpose and it won't help.
The real point here is that we all have "ideas" and things that sound good to other people that we agree with. Those things are not your purpose or my purpose, they are just ideas. Like my electric car, being petroleum free is a very interesting academic discussion. The reality is, most people don't care, so it won't happen. In my case my purpose was advancing my economic flexibility by reducing my monthly costs. That was very important to me so I did get the electric car.
If you can map out your purpose clearly, decisions come easy because all you need to do is ask, does that fit my purpose. When it does, you do it, when it doesn't you don't. Life is that simple, we just complicate it trying to please others and fit in, instead of being who we really are.
If you can answer a few simple questions for you, your life and your work, the rest gets easy. The hard part is deciding exactly what you want from this journey we call life.
And before we get there, here is the great irony, we all respect and admire people that make decisions. We might not agree with them, but they are the people we look to. Why not become that person?
These questions should help, if you can answer them you are on your way to making better decisions.
Where are you going? Not today, but what does your future look like? This is the "vision" of your perfect life, a dream you will actually live and achieve. Most people I talk to can't tell me what their dream is anymore. Life has sucked it out of them.
What are you doing to get there? Are you making progress every day, Are you training to be the best you that you can be so you can get where you are going?
How do you contribute? What do you do that adds value to the rest of the world so they will help you get there. What is it that lets you make the decisions and lead the way?
What's in it for you, I mean really? This can be anything and is the toughest and most important question to ask. When you really sit down with most smokers, they can't find a reason that matters to them. It is normally about "they say I should quit". When you ask dieters why they fail, it is similarly about comfort. When I lost 30 pounds, I was in a new zone. My comfort level changed, my wardrobe changed, and change can be tough. This is the most important question. If there isn't anything in it for you that you really want, you aren't likely to achieve much more than the norm.
When you define your purpose, you gladly take the road less traveled without fear or worry. Where will you road take you?
Monday, October 14, 2013
Is Failure The Road To Success?
Several people throughout my life have said something like "Failure is the road to success". I even noticed a little ad in the Wall Street Journal this week that used that quote. So do we really need to lead a life of failure to succeed? Does that make any sense to you? How could you possibly want success if you knew that your life was going to be littered with failure.
Is this why so many people just accept where they are in life? Doesn't everyone want to know how to be successful? If not, why wouldn't they want to be successful? Don't you want to be more successful than you are now?
Since a big part of my work now is helping other people become more successful, I started thinking about failure and its role in life after reading an article in the recent issue of INC magazine. A few of you will know my success principle of "Be careful who you listen too". For those of you that don't know it, one of the principles I live by, one that I consider one of the keys to my success, is that I don't take advice from anyone who isn't doing better than I am at the thing they are advising me on.
Real Estate Agents are a great example. A big chunk of them don't own a home, and a larger percentage don't own investment property. So how can they give me advice on something I am pretty good at, and they aren't really doing? My opinion is simply they can't. I got my own license about two years ago to do better for myself and help anyone who is serious about buying or selling. Don't call me if you are a "looky lou".
The recent INC magazine article was focused on Jim Collins of Good to Great fame and his work at The United States Military Academy.
Most of you know the United States Military Academy as "Westpoint". Many who know about it consider Westpoint the college for the elite army officers. The list of high achieving alumni supports this view.
According to INC magazine, Jim Collins learned a little about leadership while working with the cadets. As the article points out, Jim Collins has spent his life researching organization success, not personal success. Westpoint should have realized, that Mr. Collins isn't an expert at Military Leadership either, and as he learned these are very different things.
Another question I had to ask about the articles perspective; Is there a difference between organizational success and individual success? Can you have highly effective organizations that we call successful without having highly effective or "successful" people running it? I believe that one is required to have the other. An organization can hold back great people, and a great organization can be destroyed by lesser people being at the top. What I have read in Mr. Collins books lead me to believe that he agrees with my premise even though he doesn't directly say it.
My thoughts are that at the core of all great companies is great people. Do you think you can build a great company with idiots? This should be common sense right?
Some companies are better at collecting a higher percentage of successful people to create a more successful company. Others do a great job creating successful people who in turn create successful businesses. This was really the legacy of Jack Welch during his reign at GE isn't it? He created a great management and leadership funnel, the people that made it through the funnel made great companies.
Tommy Caldwell, considered one of the worlds best rock climbers, is attempting to be the first person ever to climb the face of El Cap in Yosemite park un assisted. This means he is going to do it with no ropes, no nails in the rocks, no hexectric nuts or link cams, just a man climbing a rock. I am sure he gets to wear the shoes though.
So far he has "failed" four times, and according to INC, when Jim Collins asked him why he goes back after failing, Tommy Caldwell replied that he was getting better each time. Tommy Caldwell didn't fail, he tried and improved. Just as the Japanese use Kaizen in business, Tommy Caldwell uses it in rock climbing.
Right there was the secret to crossing a long section of the road to success. Failure is not the road to success. Failure is failure. Moving forward on the road is how you get you to success. There is no other way.
Some of this may appear to be semantics, some of this is in "The Mind", and the reality is still that failure is failure and progress is progress no matter how you define it. Success does not come from failure. Success comes from moving forward no matter how difficult.
This point of view was a frustration I have had with many business improvement and self help books. They would use the word failure when referencing attempts to move forward. I really didn't address this issue correctly in the book So Now What?
As a competitive marksman, there were two competitions at every event, a team competition and an individual competition. The best victories where when the team won, even though I wanted to win also. In 1989, both happened, and it is the best victory in my career. I won the overall event, and the team won the team event. When that happened our margin was so big, I could have been third on my team and we would have still won. Nobody carried the team and nobody held the team back, the entire team kept pushing that year. There was never a failure, only opportunities to improve.
Thomas Edison had it correct when he was asked how it felt to fail at creating the electric light bulb 10,000 times. He replied, "I didn't fail 10,000 times, the lightbulb was an invention with 10,000 steps." It was an invention worth the journey. The bigger the prize at the end, or the bigger the contribution, the more difficult the journey will be. There are no short cuts.
Those who don't really want success will see the steps as too difficult and therefore a failure. Failure becomes an excuse to quit rather than a step forward. When you say to yourself that you have failed, you give yourself permission to quit and seek a new road. You change your definition of success to fit your failures. Failure is failure only if you don't learn from it and let it choose your direction.
This may seem like a very subtle difference in language and it really is. How you view the steps will determine if you make it to your destination or not. When you look at high achievers, they are still real people just like you and me. The difference starts with how they view failure, and how big their goals are. When things don't work and people laugh and ridicule, high achievers keep moving. They don't quit.
So why do people accept failure as failure? Simply put it is comfortable. Since none of their peers have done it, they don't feel the need to do it, and not doing it keep them at a level they are comfortable with. This can happen to anyone at any level in life.
The times in my life I wanted to quit are few but they happened. I have lived through and proven both sides of this process of the mind as it relates to failure and success. The most memorable for me was in 1990. I was ready to quit Air Force Pilot training because of a letter stating that I did "not have the attitude conducive to fly a fighter". It didn't say I wasn't qualified or I had failed, but I read it that way and I accepted the letter as failure.
Ready to walk away and return to my "comfortable" life, a friend, classmate and Air Force Academy Graduate, Mike Leonas, convinced me it was simply an opportunity to improve. Thanks to Mike I ended up having a great time flying in the military for the next 14 years.
If you really want to get where you are going, get better with each attempt. Get stronger at the core skill so you can push a little harder each time until you get "there" and can come up with a new place to go. More importantly, as Mike Leonas showed me, surround yourself with friends who don't understand failure, and truly understand opportunities to improve.
The journey really is the thing. Why do you think Richard Branson keeps building companies? When he gets to one destination, he keeps moving to another one. When Steve Jobs was fired from Apple, he continued to move towards his destination. When he came back, he brought Apple with him. Life is about the opportunities to improve.
Think about Elon Musk starting a new technically advanced car company that only offers 100% electric cars. He already had a successful business and was a billionaire, why risk it all to get into the car business and build a car that no one else builds? Didn't anyone tell him about the Tucker Car Company? Clearly at that level, Constant Improvement works.
Failure is not the road to success, failure isn't even on the road to success. The road to success is paved with little cobblestones of success and then taking one step to place the next stone. Always pushing a little more each time than you did the time before and getting closer to the goal each time is the key. Failure is when you quit, nothing more. This is why a coach can be such a big help.
Making each step better than the last is the key to success. Failure is how some people will define a step that doesn't end at success. The problem, like Edison found, is that you don't know how many steps that will be.
As the proverb goes, You are closest to success, just before you quit.
Get better at what ever you do every day and you will be called a success before you know it.
Is this why so many people just accept where they are in life? Doesn't everyone want to know how to be successful? If not, why wouldn't they want to be successful? Don't you want to be more successful than you are now?
Since a big part of my work now is helping other people become more successful, I started thinking about failure and its role in life after reading an article in the recent issue of INC magazine. A few of you will know my success principle of "Be careful who you listen too". For those of you that don't know it, one of the principles I live by, one that I consider one of the keys to my success, is that I don't take advice from anyone who isn't doing better than I am at the thing they are advising me on.
Real Estate Agents are a great example. A big chunk of them don't own a home, and a larger percentage don't own investment property. So how can they give me advice on something I am pretty good at, and they aren't really doing? My opinion is simply they can't. I got my own license about two years ago to do better for myself and help anyone who is serious about buying or selling. Don't call me if you are a "looky lou".
The recent INC magazine article was focused on Jim Collins of Good to Great fame and his work at The United States Military Academy.
Most of you know the United States Military Academy as "Westpoint". Many who know about it consider Westpoint the college for the elite army officers. The list of high achieving alumni supports this view.
According to INC magazine, Jim Collins learned a little about leadership while working with the cadets. As the article points out, Jim Collins has spent his life researching organization success, not personal success. Westpoint should have realized, that Mr. Collins isn't an expert at Military Leadership either, and as he learned these are very different things.
Another question I had to ask about the articles perspective; Is there a difference between organizational success and individual success? Can you have highly effective organizations that we call successful without having highly effective or "successful" people running it? I believe that one is required to have the other. An organization can hold back great people, and a great organization can be destroyed by lesser people being at the top. What I have read in Mr. Collins books lead me to believe that he agrees with my premise even though he doesn't directly say it.
My thoughts are that at the core of all great companies is great people. Do you think you can build a great company with idiots? This should be common sense right?
Some companies are better at collecting a higher percentage of successful people to create a more successful company. Others do a great job creating successful people who in turn create successful businesses. This was really the legacy of Jack Welch during his reign at GE isn't it? He created a great management and leadership funnel, the people that made it through the funnel made great companies.
Tommy Caldwell, considered one of the worlds best rock climbers, is attempting to be the first person ever to climb the face of El Cap in Yosemite park un assisted. This means he is going to do it with no ropes, no nails in the rocks, no hexectric nuts or link cams, just a man climbing a rock. I am sure he gets to wear the shoes though.
So far he has "failed" four times, and according to INC, when Jim Collins asked him why he goes back after failing, Tommy Caldwell replied that he was getting better each time. Tommy Caldwell didn't fail, he tried and improved. Just as the Japanese use Kaizen in business, Tommy Caldwell uses it in rock climbing.
Right there was the secret to crossing a long section of the road to success. Failure is not the road to success. Failure is failure. Moving forward on the road is how you get you to success. There is no other way.
Some of this may appear to be semantics, some of this is in "The Mind", and the reality is still that failure is failure and progress is progress no matter how you define it. Success does not come from failure. Success comes from moving forward no matter how difficult.
This point of view was a frustration I have had with many business improvement and self help books. They would use the word failure when referencing attempts to move forward. I really didn't address this issue correctly in the book So Now What?
As a competitive marksman, there were two competitions at every event, a team competition and an individual competition. The best victories where when the team won, even though I wanted to win also. In 1989, both happened, and it is the best victory in my career. I won the overall event, and the team won the team event. When that happened our margin was so big, I could have been third on my team and we would have still won. Nobody carried the team and nobody held the team back, the entire team kept pushing that year. There was never a failure, only opportunities to improve.
Thomas Edison had it correct when he was asked how it felt to fail at creating the electric light bulb 10,000 times. He replied, "I didn't fail 10,000 times, the lightbulb was an invention with 10,000 steps." It was an invention worth the journey. The bigger the prize at the end, or the bigger the contribution, the more difficult the journey will be. There are no short cuts.
Those who don't really want success will see the steps as too difficult and therefore a failure. Failure becomes an excuse to quit rather than a step forward. When you say to yourself that you have failed, you give yourself permission to quit and seek a new road. You change your definition of success to fit your failures. Failure is failure only if you don't learn from it and let it choose your direction.
This may seem like a very subtle difference in language and it really is. How you view the steps will determine if you make it to your destination or not. When you look at high achievers, they are still real people just like you and me. The difference starts with how they view failure, and how big their goals are. When things don't work and people laugh and ridicule, high achievers keep moving. They don't quit.
So why do people accept failure as failure? Simply put it is comfortable. Since none of their peers have done it, they don't feel the need to do it, and not doing it keep them at a level they are comfortable with. This can happen to anyone at any level in life.
The times in my life I wanted to quit are few but they happened. I have lived through and proven both sides of this process of the mind as it relates to failure and success. The most memorable for me was in 1990. I was ready to quit Air Force Pilot training because of a letter stating that I did "not have the attitude conducive to fly a fighter". It didn't say I wasn't qualified or I had failed, but I read it that way and I accepted the letter as failure.
Ready to walk away and return to my "comfortable" life, a friend, classmate and Air Force Academy Graduate, Mike Leonas, convinced me it was simply an opportunity to improve. Thanks to Mike I ended up having a great time flying in the military for the next 14 years.
If you really want to get where you are going, get better with each attempt. Get stronger at the core skill so you can push a little harder each time until you get "there" and can come up with a new place to go. More importantly, as Mike Leonas showed me, surround yourself with friends who don't understand failure, and truly understand opportunities to improve.
The journey really is the thing. Why do you think Richard Branson keeps building companies? When he gets to one destination, he keeps moving to another one. When Steve Jobs was fired from Apple, he continued to move towards his destination. When he came back, he brought Apple with him. Life is about the opportunities to improve.
Think about Elon Musk starting a new technically advanced car company that only offers 100% electric cars. He already had a successful business and was a billionaire, why risk it all to get into the car business and build a car that no one else builds? Didn't anyone tell him about the Tucker Car Company? Clearly at that level, Constant Improvement works.
Failure is not the road to success, failure isn't even on the road to success. The road to success is paved with little cobblestones of success and then taking one step to place the next stone. Always pushing a little more each time than you did the time before and getting closer to the goal each time is the key. Failure is when you quit, nothing more. This is why a coach can be such a big help.
Making each step better than the last is the key to success. Failure is how some people will define a step that doesn't end at success. The problem, like Edison found, is that you don't know how many steps that will be.
As the proverb goes, You are closest to success, just before you quit.
Get better at what ever you do every day and you will be called a success before you know it.
Thursday, October 3, 2013
Would You Like To Know Something I Wish I Knew Then?
This has been an interesting year for some people, me included. The company that was my primary income declared bankruptcy, and became my secondary job in the same 12 month period. How you do you stay on the road to success when this happens?
Some of my friends have pinned their lives on various other events this year over which they have no control. Overall, my closest group of friends are all doing quite well when compared to last year and the year before. Sadly a few have become emotionally invested in events that they have no way to control or benefit from.
Why is that? The economic data says that people aren't doing better. They might be back at work but relative to inflation, average incomes are down, the cost of housing is on the rise and most people are struggling to make ends meet. So what is the difference between my friends who are doing better and everyone else? Do you want to know? I mean, do you REALLY want to know what success keys they have?
My question is for those of us that are a little farther along in life, what would you have liked to have really known 20 years ago? What knowledge would have changed your life? What would you do differently? I will tell you there are two main things that I would have done differently had I been given the right information. I have enough that I wish I knew to write a book. If I do, will you want to read it?
My next question for the younger people. Do you want to know? I am not sure that I would have at the time. My niece is more worried about her friends. My nephew though, his is paying attention.
In my 20's, I was on a mission to do something, the problem was that I didn't know what that something was. Even if I was given the right information, would I have done anything different? I almost think I was given the information, and ignored it because it didn't fit my world. What I needed was a real mentor, and I didn't have one. I had some great coaches though.
This week I took a class with Marki Costello. The Costello name comes directly from the "Abbot and Costello" comedy franchise. In the world of Hollywood, she is part of the royal circle. During the class I talked to a woman for two and a half minutes.
Marki said to "interview" this woman and only listen to what she was saying. All of my questions were supposed to be related to what she said. Sadly, I couldn't. The coach in me was fighting to get out, and yet while I did what I was supposed to do, she just said the same thing over and over. I listened and she never asked me for advice. She just told me how she was doing it. It was like looking in a time warped mirror. I could hear myself 20 years ago and wanted to reach over and tell her to shut up and listen. I wanted to set her straight, and show her why her life wasn't going where she wanted it too. I didn't.
This leads to the first lesson and the first thing I wish I had known. I don't mean known like I could tell my friends, but known like truly understood. There are some people who really know what they want early on in life. Jon Bon Jovi nailed it early on in life. Me? I was just goofing off with no direction. This woman had four jobs, and hasn't made real success at any of them. I have had four jobs and by most accounts I am now "successful" at all of them. She hasn't truly hit success in any of them and can't focus on any one of them. Sadly she is the only one in the way of her success.
It is funny that it worked out for me the way it did. As a kid I used to watch Family Ties with Michael J. Fox because I was the entrepreneur in the household of "safe" people. I used to read about interest rates, and how to make money in real estate all the way back to the 5th grade. Before that I was on TV as a kid on "Romper Room" and early reality TV on ABC's Junior All Star program.
Safe people can be like my in-laws and work for the government and get a check on the 1st and 15th, or like my parents and become doctors. My mom got a Ph.D. from Stanford and my Father was a Dentist who graduated from USC. It is just a different version of "safe" income. Their degrees were as reliable at getting jobs as the government was for my in-laws. So what did I do? I left home without finishing High School.
So would I listen? I don't know. Do you want to listen? I hope so.
The one thing I would change is the four job thing. While I am having a good time now, the individual struggles with each job delayed growth in others. Being in the top 10% of four jobs isn't nearly as rewarding as being in the top 1% of just one job.
My hindsight tells me that I focused on the wrong job first. John Travolta became an actor first, pilot second. I did it the other way around. I spent many more years to become a professional pilot before I could start in real estate as an investor and Realtor while working to build my knowledge of business and marketing. Finally I returned to acting part time a year ago. So who makes more money? John Travolta without a doubt. Who works less? I am guessing John Travolta.
I am not complaining about my life, rather I am pointing out that if I had known then what I know now, I would hope that I would approach things differently. I could do all of the same things and by simply changing the order, I could have been more successful at any one of them or all of them. If I knew then what I know now.
So my question to you is this. If I sat down with my high roller friends who are pilots, actors, real estate investors and business owners, living in million dollar homes, would you be interested in knowing what they wished they had known then? Would you change what you are doing now if they shared that knowledge?
That is what I want to know.
Some of my friends have pinned their lives on various other events this year over which they have no control. Overall, my closest group of friends are all doing quite well when compared to last year and the year before. Sadly a few have become emotionally invested in events that they have no way to control or benefit from.
Why is that? The economic data says that people aren't doing better. They might be back at work but relative to inflation, average incomes are down, the cost of housing is on the rise and most people are struggling to make ends meet. So what is the difference between my friends who are doing better and everyone else? Do you want to know? I mean, do you REALLY want to know what success keys they have?
My question is for those of us that are a little farther along in life, what would you have liked to have really known 20 years ago? What knowledge would have changed your life? What would you do differently? I will tell you there are two main things that I would have done differently had I been given the right information. I have enough that I wish I knew to write a book. If I do, will you want to read it?
My next question for the younger people. Do you want to know? I am not sure that I would have at the time. My niece is more worried about her friends. My nephew though, his is paying attention.
In my 20's, I was on a mission to do something, the problem was that I didn't know what that something was. Even if I was given the right information, would I have done anything different? I almost think I was given the information, and ignored it because it didn't fit my world. What I needed was a real mentor, and I didn't have one. I had some great coaches though.
This week I took a class with Marki Costello. The Costello name comes directly from the "Abbot and Costello" comedy franchise. In the world of Hollywood, she is part of the royal circle. During the class I talked to a woman for two and a half minutes.
Marki said to "interview" this woman and only listen to what she was saying. All of my questions were supposed to be related to what she said. Sadly, I couldn't. The coach in me was fighting to get out, and yet while I did what I was supposed to do, she just said the same thing over and over. I listened and she never asked me for advice. She just told me how she was doing it. It was like looking in a time warped mirror. I could hear myself 20 years ago and wanted to reach over and tell her to shut up and listen. I wanted to set her straight, and show her why her life wasn't going where she wanted it too. I didn't.
This leads to the first lesson and the first thing I wish I had known. I don't mean known like I could tell my friends, but known like truly understood. There are some people who really know what they want early on in life. Jon Bon Jovi nailed it early on in life. Me? I was just goofing off with no direction. This woman had four jobs, and hasn't made real success at any of them. I have had four jobs and by most accounts I am now "successful" at all of them. She hasn't truly hit success in any of them and can't focus on any one of them. Sadly she is the only one in the way of her success.
It is funny that it worked out for me the way it did. As a kid I used to watch Family Ties with Michael J. Fox because I was the entrepreneur in the household of "safe" people. I used to read about interest rates, and how to make money in real estate all the way back to the 5th grade. Before that I was on TV as a kid on "Romper Room" and early reality TV on ABC's Junior All Star program.
Safe people can be like my in-laws and work for the government and get a check on the 1st and 15th, or like my parents and become doctors. My mom got a Ph.D. from Stanford and my Father was a Dentist who graduated from USC. It is just a different version of "safe" income. Their degrees were as reliable at getting jobs as the government was for my in-laws. So what did I do? I left home without finishing High School.
So would I listen? I don't know. Do you want to listen? I hope so.
The one thing I would change is the four job thing. While I am having a good time now, the individual struggles with each job delayed growth in others. Being in the top 10% of four jobs isn't nearly as rewarding as being in the top 1% of just one job.
My hindsight tells me that I focused on the wrong job first. John Travolta became an actor first, pilot second. I did it the other way around. I spent many more years to become a professional pilot before I could start in real estate as an investor and Realtor while working to build my knowledge of business and marketing. Finally I returned to acting part time a year ago. So who makes more money? John Travolta without a doubt. Who works less? I am guessing John Travolta.
I am not complaining about my life, rather I am pointing out that if I had known then what I know now, I would hope that I would approach things differently. I could do all of the same things and by simply changing the order, I could have been more successful at any one of them or all of them. If I knew then what I know now.
So my question to you is this. If I sat down with my high roller friends who are pilots, actors, real estate investors and business owners, living in million dollar homes, would you be interested in knowing what they wished they had known then? Would you change what you are doing now if they shared that knowledge?
That is what I want to know.
Friday, September 27, 2013
Farming One Crop, or Multiple Crops For success which is better?
Have you ever felt that school was a waste of time? Have you ever been lost in a subject to the point you didn't know the time or even the day? How can it be that you absorb some things very well, and others topics of education can be so uninteresting that you have to work just to stay awake?
The reality is simple, and the truth isn't easy. As humans we are hard wired to have an interest in certain things. Those interests create the desire to learn more. No interest, no desire. Great teachers create interest first, lessons second. Boring lecturers spew out lessons and hope you can force or fake interest.
Technical schools and apprentice programs used to be the way of life, but corporations found these a bit too risky and pushed the responsibility to the government, which by the way gladly accepted. The problem was instead of allowing people to find an interesting path and become great at it, we were all lined up on boring roads and received somewhat generic educations. This is why the greatest technical companies like Hewlett-Packard, Bell Telephone (AT&T), Edison Electric and Apple were created by those that stepped out of the system and created their own learning path. They stayed interested.
So what does this have to do with Farming and Success? Much like school, life and business offer us a variety of ways to grow and succeed. The two Steve's of Apple, Mr. Hewlett and Mr. Packard, along with Mr. Bell and even Mr. Edison all showed us a different way to build success outside of the halls of education.
Ironically, farmers figured this out long before industrialization, and the lesson is one worth looking at.
In my coaching life, focus is a major element of my work. I spend a lot of hours with clients getting them to simplify and focus on a small number of important tasks and goals instead of giant, endless to do lists that are really just busy work to avoid the hard work that needs to be done.
Lately I have been called a hypocrite more than once. Besides coaching, I still fly, train our internet marketing staff, and am involved in real estate as an investor, trainer and agent. So the question I get is "How can you claim focus is so important when you have so many irons in the fire?"
To start with, I don't look at these like irons in the fire. I look at them like a farm. You can build one giant farm with one crop. As long as that crop does good, you will do great. The better you do the more land you can buy and the better you get at knowing how to get the most money from that crop per acre. You get the best prices on seeds, pesticides and labor because of the economy of scale and your ability to buy in quantity.
You can also build a farm that has several smaller crops of higher margin. By learning how to grow crops that help each other in pest prevention, soil conservation and nutrient usage, you can also create a great farm. You can never compete against the single crop neighbor on a price basis, and when the economy turns south, you might be in a riskier position. However, the single crop master farmer has to worry about a single shift ending his business. What if he grows sugar cane, and the government decides to tax sugar 100% because it causes health problems. He could be out of business overnight because you can't just change to tobacco in a day or even a month.
Starting a multi crop farm takes a different kind of focus. You must have a big picture of what you are trying to do overall, for instance create an organic farm, or a farm store. You must also focus on each crop one at a time until you learn them so each are a small success. Your sugar might only yield 80% as much per acre, but your higher quality can yield equal or higher profits per acre. Think Tiffany's.
When I sit down to write, I am a writer. When I go to the studio to act, I am an actor. I don't bring Real Estate to the studio, and I don't practice acting during open houses or when I am flying jets. When I fly jets, I look and act like a pilot. When I am in the Real Estate office working, training or attending a meeting, I look like a professional full time Realtor.
As I built my life, I did it in stages. I worked at flying jets until I was highly proficient and only need a few hours each month to maintain my skills. Then I could start classes for Real Estate. I worked at that as an investor for years and know have my methods down to simple checklists. I can evaluate an investment in less than 15 minutes.
Finally I could start acting classes and work at adding acting to my skill and income sets. Writing is really just an extension of my experience just like coaching is, but I still take classes to be better at both of them as well.
I would probably make a little more money if I just picked on, and did it all of the time. I am very fortunate to have started on my first path very early, and having stuck with it, was able to move on to the next with plenty of time on my life clock left.
In Flying will I ever be Bob Hoover? Nope.
In Real Estate Investing will I be Donald Trump? Nope.
In Acting will I be Tom Cruise or John Travolta or even Scott Baio? Nope.
In Writing will I be Steven King? Nope.
Can I do quite well at all of them individually so that the income and lifestyle add up to something like they live? Yes, and that is the life I designed for myself.
Because I built my life this way on purpose, I don't work at any one job. In fact I don't work at any of my jobs. They are all fun. I am doing now almost exactly what I want to do when I am "retired". It doesn't get any better than that.
So it doesn't matter which type of business or life you want to build, a single faceted super sized business/life or a multifaceted business/life. As long as you pick one, do it with purpose and take the time to develop each facet or perfect the single face of your business, success can be achieved either way. As long as there is a destination or goal to focus on you can do it. No destination, no focus, no achieving the goal.
As you head into the weekend, really take a look at what you want. A single mission business or do you want to do something more? I like getting small and medium checks daily from all kinds of sources. Some people need steady checks on the first and fifteenth, and others can do with one or two really big checks a year. What do you want?
You can start with a single business like real estate investing and turn it into a 100 Million Dollar empire like Dean Graziosi did and then the checks don't matter as much. Success really is that simple, it just isn't easy.
The reality is simple, and the truth isn't easy. As humans we are hard wired to have an interest in certain things. Those interests create the desire to learn more. No interest, no desire. Great teachers create interest first, lessons second. Boring lecturers spew out lessons and hope you can force or fake interest.
Technical schools and apprentice programs used to be the way of life, but corporations found these a bit too risky and pushed the responsibility to the government, which by the way gladly accepted. The problem was instead of allowing people to find an interesting path and become great at it, we were all lined up on boring roads and received somewhat generic educations. This is why the greatest technical companies like Hewlett-Packard, Bell Telephone (AT&T), Edison Electric and Apple were created by those that stepped out of the system and created their own learning path. They stayed interested.
So what does this have to do with Farming and Success? Much like school, life and business offer us a variety of ways to grow and succeed. The two Steve's of Apple, Mr. Hewlett and Mr. Packard, along with Mr. Bell and even Mr. Edison all showed us a different way to build success outside of the halls of education.
Ironically, farmers figured this out long before industrialization, and the lesson is one worth looking at.
In my coaching life, focus is a major element of my work. I spend a lot of hours with clients getting them to simplify and focus on a small number of important tasks and goals instead of giant, endless to do lists that are really just busy work to avoid the hard work that needs to be done.
Lately I have been called a hypocrite more than once. Besides coaching, I still fly, train our internet marketing staff, and am involved in real estate as an investor, trainer and agent. So the question I get is "How can you claim focus is so important when you have so many irons in the fire?"
To start with, I don't look at these like irons in the fire. I look at them like a farm. You can build one giant farm with one crop. As long as that crop does good, you will do great. The better you do the more land you can buy and the better you get at knowing how to get the most money from that crop per acre. You get the best prices on seeds, pesticides and labor because of the economy of scale and your ability to buy in quantity.
You can also build a farm that has several smaller crops of higher margin. By learning how to grow crops that help each other in pest prevention, soil conservation and nutrient usage, you can also create a great farm. You can never compete against the single crop neighbor on a price basis, and when the economy turns south, you might be in a riskier position. However, the single crop master farmer has to worry about a single shift ending his business. What if he grows sugar cane, and the government decides to tax sugar 100% because it causes health problems. He could be out of business overnight because you can't just change to tobacco in a day or even a month.
Starting a multi crop farm takes a different kind of focus. You must have a big picture of what you are trying to do overall, for instance create an organic farm, or a farm store. You must also focus on each crop one at a time until you learn them so each are a small success. Your sugar might only yield 80% as much per acre, but your higher quality can yield equal or higher profits per acre. Think Tiffany's.
When I sit down to write, I am a writer. When I go to the studio to act, I am an actor. I don't bring Real Estate to the studio, and I don't practice acting during open houses or when I am flying jets. When I fly jets, I look and act like a pilot. When I am in the Real Estate office working, training or attending a meeting, I look like a professional full time Realtor.
As I built my life, I did it in stages. I worked at flying jets until I was highly proficient and only need a few hours each month to maintain my skills. Then I could start classes for Real Estate. I worked at that as an investor for years and know have my methods down to simple checklists. I can evaluate an investment in less than 15 minutes.
Finally I could start acting classes and work at adding acting to my skill and income sets. Writing is really just an extension of my experience just like coaching is, but I still take classes to be better at both of them as well.
I would probably make a little more money if I just picked on, and did it all of the time. I am very fortunate to have started on my first path very early, and having stuck with it, was able to move on to the next with plenty of time on my life clock left.
In Flying will I ever be Bob Hoover? Nope.
In Real Estate Investing will I be Donald Trump? Nope.
In Acting will I be Tom Cruise or John Travolta or even Scott Baio? Nope.
In Writing will I be Steven King? Nope.
Can I do quite well at all of them individually so that the income and lifestyle add up to something like they live? Yes, and that is the life I designed for myself.
Because I built my life this way on purpose, I don't work at any one job. In fact I don't work at any of my jobs. They are all fun. I am doing now almost exactly what I want to do when I am "retired". It doesn't get any better than that.
So it doesn't matter which type of business or life you want to build, a single faceted super sized business/life or a multifaceted business/life. As long as you pick one, do it with purpose and take the time to develop each facet or perfect the single face of your business, success can be achieved either way. As long as there is a destination or goal to focus on you can do it. No destination, no focus, no achieving the goal.
As you head into the weekend, really take a look at what you want. A single mission business or do you want to do something more? I like getting small and medium checks daily from all kinds of sources. Some people need steady checks on the first and fifteenth, and others can do with one or two really big checks a year. What do you want?
You can start with a single business like real estate investing and turn it into a 100 Million Dollar empire like Dean Graziosi did and then the checks don't matter as much. Success really is that simple, it just isn't easy.
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
The Carrot and Stick For Better Business Success
In earlier posts I discussed going outside of the envelope. As a pilot we would train by leaving the envelope in a spin, and recovering to the normal realm of flight. There is a step I didn't mention. In military flying, because the training puts you closer to the edge of the envelope so often, and you spend so much time outside of it to gain understanding of aircraft performance, the jets have ejections seats.
If you go into a spin and you get below an altitude that will allow you to recover, you simply eject and save your life. You can always get a new airplane.
While not a proud moment in my life, having to walk away from a business I spent 8 years building, it was the right thing to do. The business went into a spin and did not have the finances to recover. I ejected, regrouped and went back into business. Most who eject in business will never go back.
Knowing when to bow out of the game is just as critical to success as pushing forward. Just like being in an airplane there are some indicators that the spin is getting too low and you need to do something differently and quickly or you are going to need to eject out of the business. A late ejection is called a bankruptcy.
Running a business is a challenge that very few will ever try. Fewer yet will be successful at it, and a big part of my life has been spent understanding why. A few will have failed in one business only to succeed in another as I did. Without doing this I don't think I could have the understanding I have now.
Within the business all of the people have an effect on the outcome. If you don't believe it, you are looking at your business all wrong. Paying someone to do nothing at all still takes money away from the bottom line and therefore effects the outcome of your business.
When everyone is clear on what the mission is of the business and is properly trained in their jobs, the owner is only there to make minor course corrections and keep everyone moving forward. The owner acts more like an interested investor or a coach when the business is set up right.
During the early days of Apple, Microsoft and Cisco, there were a lot of ups and downs. The people that stuck it out made millions on their stock options. The success of the company created their individual financial success.
As a leader, your job is to make sure that there is a stick, and it is used only when needed. Too much discipline, unfair attacks or any kind of discrimination just hurt the business. Failing to enforce the rules of the business can be worse. In my successful businesses my employee turnover was near zero. In my failed venture, I had 80% quarterly turnover of key employees. The business had a major problem and I couldn't see it until I ejected and could look at it without having the worry of making payroll.
These days I spend way more time hiring and turn away new business when I don't have the people or capital to service the customer properly. I know how hard it is to turn away good money, but if you can't earn it, you have to turn down the work until you are ready.
Employees, staff and contractors all need to know what the "sticks" are for not making the goals. A friend of mine just got a promotion at his company because someone falsified some records. The stick was a swift termination. This is exactly the right thing for the company to do. They don't do it often, but when they do find a salesperson falsifying records, the zero tolerance policy is enforced.
Being "nice" has no place in decision making at this level of the game. If the person is lying on paper, they will lie to you and your customers. They need to go.
Of even greater importance are the carrots. The rewards for doing great work must be there. Just like you need to give yourself rewards, you need to learn what your employees really want. When you learn that and give it to them as a reward for exceptional performance. When you do, they will deliver and keep delivering.
Most owners don't take the time to learn about their employees and find out what they really want. You can't learn what sticks they'll fear and respect so you won't need to use them if you don't know your staff. Likewise, you can't learn the rewards if you don't know who they are either.
Know where you want your business to go, know what your people really want and don't want to go and you are off to a great start. There is more but if you don't get this part right the rest won't matter.
If you go into a spin and you get below an altitude that will allow you to recover, you simply eject and save your life. You can always get a new airplane.
While not a proud moment in my life, having to walk away from a business I spent 8 years building, it was the right thing to do. The business went into a spin and did not have the finances to recover. I ejected, regrouped and went back into business. Most who eject in business will never go back.
Knowing when to bow out of the game is just as critical to success as pushing forward. Just like being in an airplane there are some indicators that the spin is getting too low and you need to do something differently and quickly or you are going to need to eject out of the business. A late ejection is called a bankruptcy.
Running a business is a challenge that very few will ever try. Fewer yet will be successful at it, and a big part of my life has been spent understanding why. A few will have failed in one business only to succeed in another as I did. Without doing this I don't think I could have the understanding I have now.
Within the business all of the people have an effect on the outcome. If you don't believe it, you are looking at your business all wrong. Paying someone to do nothing at all still takes money away from the bottom line and therefore effects the outcome of your business.
When everyone is clear on what the mission is of the business and is properly trained in their jobs, the owner is only there to make minor course corrections and keep everyone moving forward. The owner acts more like an interested investor or a coach when the business is set up right.
During the early days of Apple, Microsoft and Cisco, there were a lot of ups and downs. The people that stuck it out made millions on their stock options. The success of the company created their individual financial success.
As a leader, your job is to make sure that there is a stick, and it is used only when needed. Too much discipline, unfair attacks or any kind of discrimination just hurt the business. Failing to enforce the rules of the business can be worse. In my successful businesses my employee turnover was near zero. In my failed venture, I had 80% quarterly turnover of key employees. The business had a major problem and I couldn't see it until I ejected and could look at it without having the worry of making payroll.
These days I spend way more time hiring and turn away new business when I don't have the people or capital to service the customer properly. I know how hard it is to turn away good money, but if you can't earn it, you have to turn down the work until you are ready.
Employees, staff and contractors all need to know what the "sticks" are for not making the goals. A friend of mine just got a promotion at his company because someone falsified some records. The stick was a swift termination. This is exactly the right thing for the company to do. They don't do it often, but when they do find a salesperson falsifying records, the zero tolerance policy is enforced.
Being "nice" has no place in decision making at this level of the game. If the person is lying on paper, they will lie to you and your customers. They need to go.
Of even greater importance are the carrots. The rewards for doing great work must be there. Just like you need to give yourself rewards, you need to learn what your employees really want. When you learn that and give it to them as a reward for exceptional performance. When you do, they will deliver and keep delivering.
Most owners don't take the time to learn about their employees and find out what they really want. You can't learn what sticks they'll fear and respect so you won't need to use them if you don't know your staff. Likewise, you can't learn the rewards if you don't know who they are either.
Know where you want your business to go, know what your people really want and don't want to go and you are off to a great start. There is more but if you don't get this part right the rest won't matter.
Monday, September 23, 2013
The Carrot and Stick For Higher Personal Performance and Success
I've been bouncing around the ideas of Activity - Reward and Carrot - Stick for business and personal success. This will be about personal success, because your business can't succeed if you aren't a success yourself.
To start I want to talk about "being" for a moment. In the Zen sense of it all "being" is just that. Basically meditating or doing something without effort or thought. When you do that you are just "being".
The problem is that most people don't have any ingrained survival skills any more when they are just "being". When a cat is "being" and it runs across a mouse, it will catch the mouse, and if it is hungry it will eat everything but the head. It saves the head as a gift for it's master. The cat is simply "being" a cat.
A buddhist monk can just be walking the monastery, growing food, preparing meals and meditating because they have trained to exist in this mode of being. Most of the rest of us haven't trained to survive and therefore succeed in any mode of being.
Socialization and industrialization has conditioned our ability to survive out of our "being". When we are hungry, we don't kill the next bird that fly's by and eat it do we? Leave a former Navy Seal alone on the street hungry, and he will. Why? Because he was conditioned back to a different level of survival and to him, being hungry simply means time to gather food. The bird is just food.
In order to succeed while you are just "being", you must first have a vision of who you want to be, where that person is going, what it took to get there, and then "become" the person who makes the journey from where you are today to the person you are "being" and therefore become.
Imagine a woman, broke, lonely and working at a dead end job barely able to make her rent. After going to a big self help conference she decides to set some huge goals and shoot for the stars. She decides that she is going to make $5 Million dollars this year. She goes home reads the books, thinks about making $5 Million a year, maybe even prays to make $5 Million a year. At the end of the day she keeps her same job, and at the end of the year, she gives up feeling that she failed because she wasn't making $5 Million for the year.
What went wrong? Aren't we supposed to "Think and Grow Rich"? The answer is a little more than just thinking about making $5 Million a year. Before you can be someone who makes $5 Million per year, you have to be that person who made $24,000 per year who then made $5 Million per year. "Being" a lottery winner or trust fund baby only works if you get lucky, and this isn't about luck or are born into a wealthy family, and this isn't about that either.
You can't pick your parents and you can't fix the lotto.
What I mean is this. If you want to make $5 Million per year, you have to find out about people who make $5 Million per year. They all did something to get where our woman wants to go. One of those people made the money in a way that she would find tolerable. Now she must "be" that person until it becomes part of her "being".
Before you can make the decision of who you will be, you need to know the sacrifices they made to get there. You have to be ready to make similar sacrifices. There are stories of many famous actors who finished great colleges or theater programs only to end up sleeping in their cars before their big break. If you want to be the next Brad Pitt, are you willing to sleep in your car? I know that "being" Brad Pitt isn't for me, and likewise this is where most people just walk away from big goals. They aren't willing to take the sticks and thorns of the path less traveled.
You will need to know what sacrifices they endured, what sticks they were hit with, which ones they respected and avoided. You should also know the little rewards they gave themselves on their own journey to the goal to keep moving when the journey appeared hopeless.
When you accept the sticks and carrots of the journey as your own life, then you can become someone on the journey. Only then are you "being" the person who WILL make $5 Million per year instead of the failure who didn't make $5 Million per year.
Setting goals that you don't reach is a downward spin you need to stay out of. You can only do that by understanding and accepting the real costs of your goals and "being" the person that pays the price to make the journey and achieve the goals.
"Being" is easier when you know what the carrots and sticks are and are willing to take them both anytime they happen.
To start I want to talk about "being" for a moment. In the Zen sense of it all "being" is just that. Basically meditating or doing something without effort or thought. When you do that you are just "being".
The problem is that most people don't have any ingrained survival skills any more when they are just "being". When a cat is "being" and it runs across a mouse, it will catch the mouse, and if it is hungry it will eat everything but the head. It saves the head as a gift for it's master. The cat is simply "being" a cat.
A buddhist monk can just be walking the monastery, growing food, preparing meals and meditating because they have trained to exist in this mode of being. Most of the rest of us haven't trained to survive and therefore succeed in any mode of being.
Socialization and industrialization has conditioned our ability to survive out of our "being". When we are hungry, we don't kill the next bird that fly's by and eat it do we? Leave a former Navy Seal alone on the street hungry, and he will. Why? Because he was conditioned back to a different level of survival and to him, being hungry simply means time to gather food. The bird is just food.
In order to succeed while you are just "being", you must first have a vision of who you want to be, where that person is going, what it took to get there, and then "become" the person who makes the journey from where you are today to the person you are "being" and therefore become.
Imagine a woman, broke, lonely and working at a dead end job barely able to make her rent. After going to a big self help conference she decides to set some huge goals and shoot for the stars. She decides that she is going to make $5 Million dollars this year. She goes home reads the books, thinks about making $5 Million a year, maybe even prays to make $5 Million a year. At the end of the day she keeps her same job, and at the end of the year, she gives up feeling that she failed because she wasn't making $5 Million for the year.
What went wrong? Aren't we supposed to "Think and Grow Rich"? The answer is a little more than just thinking about making $5 Million a year. Before you can be someone who makes $5 Million per year, you have to be that person who made $24,000 per year who then made $5 Million per year. "Being" a lottery winner or trust fund baby only works if you get lucky, and this isn't about luck or are born into a wealthy family, and this isn't about that either.
You can't pick your parents and you can't fix the lotto.
What I mean is this. If you want to make $5 Million per year, you have to find out about people who make $5 Million per year. They all did something to get where our woman wants to go. One of those people made the money in a way that she would find tolerable. Now she must "be" that person until it becomes part of her "being".
Before you can make the decision of who you will be, you need to know the sacrifices they made to get there. You have to be ready to make similar sacrifices. There are stories of many famous actors who finished great colleges or theater programs only to end up sleeping in their cars before their big break. If you want to be the next Brad Pitt, are you willing to sleep in your car? I know that "being" Brad Pitt isn't for me, and likewise this is where most people just walk away from big goals. They aren't willing to take the sticks and thorns of the path less traveled.
You will need to know what sacrifices they endured, what sticks they were hit with, which ones they respected and avoided. You should also know the little rewards they gave themselves on their own journey to the goal to keep moving when the journey appeared hopeless.
When you accept the sticks and carrots of the journey as your own life, then you can become someone on the journey. Only then are you "being" the person who WILL make $5 Million per year instead of the failure who didn't make $5 Million per year.
Setting goals that you don't reach is a downward spin you need to stay out of. You can only do that by understanding and accepting the real costs of your goals and "being" the person that pays the price to make the journey and achieve the goals.
"Being" is easier when you know what the carrots and sticks are and are willing to take them both anytime they happen.
Friday, September 20, 2013
Do You Need An Acting Class To Advance Your Career?
Some time ago I was given the opportunity to work on The Newsroom, and in rare form, I showed up without doing my homework. I was so glad to get the opportunity, I focused on the wrong thing. I spent more time looking at how to get there, what time I needed to leave and didn't look at what the show was about or how I would fit in or who my character was, his backstory, nothing.
I also didn't read anything about the show other than Jeff Daniels was the lead character Will McAvoy. Imagine that, the Dumb and Dumber guy as the lead in a drama. I figured it would be a great deal, and I would get to work with some cool people. I was right about that and nothing else. I just showed up, with no idea what I was doing or going to do.
Everything went very smooth after I arrived. Wardrobe, hair, makeup were all quick and easy. I had a few minutes to meet the other person who would be on set with me, Andray Johnson. Andray is a working actor, and has since helped me to become involved with the Veterans in Film and Television group.
As we got on set, they placed me next to Sloan played by Olivia Munn, the co-anchor on the show, and we start. After three quick camera checks, we are rolling and about three beats in, Jeff Daniels looks right at me and says "What do you think?". My brain just went to freeze-fright-flight mode and froze. All I could think was "That isn't on the script!" but what came out was "Uh Well You know uh". I didn't do my homework, and as John Boyd would say, I got hosed for it.
The director yelled cut, I was out, and the next guy was in. Ouch. Everyone was very nice and professional but I knew what had just happened.
Have you ever seen this happen in a sales presentation, company briefing or speech?
I bring this up because I have seen this happen in more business and sales presentations than I care to mention. Just like being on set, it is normally preparation and homework. I didn't do my homework and let the crew down and the casting director who trusted me to do a great job. Lesson learned, I won't let it happen again.
Being the true professional she is, Olivia tried to save me and slid some notes over in case I got another take. It didn't happen, and I was politely escorted off the set. Showing the level he was at, Jeff Daniels later took a moment and offered some advice. He let me know not to sweat it, and that I should get some improv training, he mentioned "The Groundlings" in Hollywood might help.
The timing hasn't worked out for The Groundlings yet, although I do intend to go if they will let me in sometime soon.
For now I am taking an acting class with Harli Ames. At last nights class we spent most of the time on improv. It is scary how much you can learn in three hours when you push yourself. It is no wonder people that do to schools like The Groundlings are so good at it.
The class has about 15 people, and only five have any acting aspirations. The rest are there to get better at public speaking, business presentations or sales presentations. Having a business degree and being an experienced public speaker, I would have never considered an acting class. If I knew then what I know now....
It was amazing to see the transition as we did an exercise called "Space Jump". If felt like being on stage with Wayne Brady. Things came out of people you would never expect. One of the most shy people in class jumped up and jumped right in, becoming a completely different person. If the class were just this one night, I would already call it money well spent.
So, DO YOU need an acting class?
I also didn't read anything about the show other than Jeff Daniels was the lead character Will McAvoy. Imagine that, the Dumb and Dumber guy as the lead in a drama. I figured it would be a great deal, and I would get to work with some cool people. I was right about that and nothing else. I just showed up, with no idea what I was doing or going to do.
Everything went very smooth after I arrived. Wardrobe, hair, makeup were all quick and easy. I had a few minutes to meet the other person who would be on set with me, Andray Johnson. Andray is a working actor, and has since helped me to become involved with the Veterans in Film and Television group.
As we got on set, they placed me next to Sloan played by Olivia Munn, the co-anchor on the show, and we start. After three quick camera checks, we are rolling and about three beats in, Jeff Daniels looks right at me and says "What do you think?". My brain just went to freeze-fright-flight mode and froze. All I could think was "That isn't on the script!" but what came out was "Uh Well You know uh". I didn't do my homework, and as John Boyd would say, I got hosed for it.
The director yelled cut, I was out, and the next guy was in. Ouch. Everyone was very nice and professional but I knew what had just happened.
Have you ever seen this happen in a sales presentation, company briefing or speech?
I bring this up because I have seen this happen in more business and sales presentations than I care to mention. Just like being on set, it is normally preparation and homework. I didn't do my homework and let the crew down and the casting director who trusted me to do a great job. Lesson learned, I won't let it happen again.
Being the true professional she is, Olivia tried to save me and slid some notes over in case I got another take. It didn't happen, and I was politely escorted off the set. Showing the level he was at, Jeff Daniels later took a moment and offered some advice. He let me know not to sweat it, and that I should get some improv training, he mentioned "The Groundlings" in Hollywood might help.
The timing hasn't worked out for The Groundlings yet, although I do intend to go if they will let me in sometime soon.
For now I am taking an acting class with Harli Ames. At last nights class we spent most of the time on improv. It is scary how much you can learn in three hours when you push yourself. It is no wonder people that do to schools like The Groundlings are so good at it.
The class has about 15 people, and only five have any acting aspirations. The rest are there to get better at public speaking, business presentations or sales presentations. Having a business degree and being an experienced public speaker, I would have never considered an acting class. If I knew then what I know now....
It was amazing to see the transition as we did an exercise called "Space Jump". If felt like being on stage with Wayne Brady. Things came out of people you would never expect. One of the most shy people in class jumped up and jumped right in, becoming a completely different person. If the class were just this one night, I would already call it money well spent.
So, DO YOU need an acting class?
Thursday, September 19, 2013
The Carrot and The Stick Management Theory
After earning my business degree, my desire to learn didn't stop. I studied Jack Welch of GE and the idea of Six Sigma. Get rid of the bottom 10%, there is a stick for sure.
A few people out there clearly won't accept my idea that some form of punishment or "stick" is required in business, and with children. They will quickly point out that I am not a psychologist, nor do I have kids.
As a Co-Pilot on a big jet, there is a lot going on. You can't see what the guy is doing behind you and are lucky to keep up with the guy to your left when you first start out. As you move into the left seat and become the "Captain" or "Aircraft Commander", you get a better view. You can see more of what is going on and make better decisions. You don't become myopic as easily.
When you become and instructor and sit in the jump seat behind the two or three pilots, you become amazingly visionary. Since you aren't actually doing anything, you see everything. This is what coaches do for a business. They stand back and look at the bigger picture, one owners and managers rarely see because they are "in" the business and get focused on some specific aspect causing them to be myopic.
In flying the "stick" when you do something really wrong is that somebody gets hurt. Look at all of the aviation accidents, and then consider how safe flying still is. The respect (not fear) of the "stick" is what keeps 99.9999% of all flights safe. The next time an airliner stops for fuel, don't get mad at the pilots, thank them for not making you part of the punishment for being too aggressive on fuel.
To the people who say the stick isn't required, my rebut is simple. Why are so many people incarcerated at such a high expense if the stick isn't required. Deep down we all know the stick is required, but in our society of political correctness, we have made the stick soft. Gym's, TV, three squares, baseball fields and movie nights? While incarceration might sound bad to most of us. Not enough of us respect or fear that stick, so too many end up getting hit by it.
My guess is the incarceration has more carrots than life on the outside for many of the people who are inside the high concrete walls. Instead of spending $100,000 per year per inmate, why don't we spend $25,000 per year to help them become productive people? Why don't we start with our children and get realistic on teaching them how life really works instead of trying to be "fair" to all of them.
As far as my experience with kids goes, my wife is a 20 year veteran of the 2nd grade classroom with an MBA. I don't ever recall seeing her classes out of control or rambunctious, but I have seen many others. Her techniques in the classroom are a big part of how we treat our niece and nephew when they stay with us.
My niece and nephew visit for extended periods because they live in other states. Weekend visits aren't practical. When they visit, we don't have any trouble with them at all. Neither of them have ever done anything to deserve capital punishment while they are with us. They didn't get "Time Out" either, I think that is a joke. Getting sent to their room? In my house that is a multimedia entertainment room any kid would like to get sent to. Our stick? Easy, supervised chores with no reward. When they did chores without being told too or without supervision and did them correctly, the same chores came with rewards.
When my nephew first came to stay for the summer he was an easy bribe. A trip to the local Sonic on Friday, in the convertible, for an ice cream with just me, was the reward. He wanted "Guy Time" and I work crazy hours. So if he did his end of the deal, I would take time away from work to do my end.
The chore? His room had to be picked up and his bed made every day for two weeks. Did it work? Yes. Did it take a little nudge the first couple of nights, yes. He was just five years old. He made his bed every day on the last visit with only one reminder. He is 11.
By the time my nephew returned to my sister, his bed was made every day, and he picked his own reward for bigger and better chores. The neat room and bed were just what he did after four weeks and two trips to the local Sonic. He started asking to help me with more work around the property so he could spend more time with me or the other boys on the street.
When was the last time your kids asked for more work?
Am I an expert at raising kids? Nope. Was I successful with my nephew when I had the chance? I think so.
So the next two questions of course are:
1. How do I apply this to managing people?
2. How do I apply this to perform better myself?
Come back next week.....
A few people out there clearly won't accept my idea that some form of punishment or "stick" is required in business, and with children. They will quickly point out that I am not a psychologist, nor do I have kids.
As a Co-Pilot on a big jet, there is a lot going on. You can't see what the guy is doing behind you and are lucky to keep up with the guy to your left when you first start out. As you move into the left seat and become the "Captain" or "Aircraft Commander", you get a better view. You can see more of what is going on and make better decisions. You don't become myopic as easily.
When you become and instructor and sit in the jump seat behind the two or three pilots, you become amazingly visionary. Since you aren't actually doing anything, you see everything. This is what coaches do for a business. They stand back and look at the bigger picture, one owners and managers rarely see because they are "in" the business and get focused on some specific aspect causing them to be myopic.
In flying the "stick" when you do something really wrong is that somebody gets hurt. Look at all of the aviation accidents, and then consider how safe flying still is. The respect (not fear) of the "stick" is what keeps 99.9999% of all flights safe. The next time an airliner stops for fuel, don't get mad at the pilots, thank them for not making you part of the punishment for being too aggressive on fuel.
To the people who say the stick isn't required, my rebut is simple. Why are so many people incarcerated at such a high expense if the stick isn't required. Deep down we all know the stick is required, but in our society of political correctness, we have made the stick soft. Gym's, TV, three squares, baseball fields and movie nights? While incarceration might sound bad to most of us. Not enough of us respect or fear that stick, so too many end up getting hit by it.
My guess is the incarceration has more carrots than life on the outside for many of the people who are inside the high concrete walls. Instead of spending $100,000 per year per inmate, why don't we spend $25,000 per year to help them become productive people? Why don't we start with our children and get realistic on teaching them how life really works instead of trying to be "fair" to all of them.
As far as my experience with kids goes, my wife is a 20 year veteran of the 2nd grade classroom with an MBA. I don't ever recall seeing her classes out of control or rambunctious, but I have seen many others. Her techniques in the classroom are a big part of how we treat our niece and nephew when they stay with us.
My niece and nephew visit for extended periods because they live in other states. Weekend visits aren't practical. When they visit, we don't have any trouble with them at all. Neither of them have ever done anything to deserve capital punishment while they are with us. They didn't get "Time Out" either, I think that is a joke. Getting sent to their room? In my house that is a multimedia entertainment room any kid would like to get sent to. Our stick? Easy, supervised chores with no reward. When they did chores without being told too or without supervision and did them correctly, the same chores came with rewards.
When my nephew first came to stay for the summer he was an easy bribe. A trip to the local Sonic on Friday, in the convertible, for an ice cream with just me, was the reward. He wanted "Guy Time" and I work crazy hours. So if he did his end of the deal, I would take time away from work to do my end.
The chore? His room had to be picked up and his bed made every day for two weeks. Did it work? Yes. Did it take a little nudge the first couple of nights, yes. He was just five years old. He made his bed every day on the last visit with only one reminder. He is 11.
By the time my nephew returned to my sister, his bed was made every day, and he picked his own reward for bigger and better chores. The neat room and bed were just what he did after four weeks and two trips to the local Sonic. He started asking to help me with more work around the property so he could spend more time with me or the other boys on the street.
When was the last time your kids asked for more work?
Am I an expert at raising kids? Nope. Was I successful with my nephew when I had the chance? I think so.
So the next two questions of course are:
1. How do I apply this to managing people?
2. How do I apply this to perform better myself?
Come back next week.....
Monday, September 16, 2013
Picking The Right Rewards
The activity - reward system isn't perfected by any means, but I have a few ideas to share with you.
Picking the rewards has to fit the principle of the activity. In an earlier post I talked about burning 400 calories and then getting an 1100 calorie shake. Just a little counter productive.
Finding self punishment is another difficult task as adults. We are taught to think "we deserve it."
One of the reasons I have a very difficult time working in a 9-5 lifestyle is the reward system. Work one year, take a two week vacation doesn't work for me.
A contractor I met some years ago taught me the "Do the deal, get a check, take a vacation" philosophy. The problem is that most people like to plan their vacations and know where they are going. You can't do that if you don't get the reward until you get the check.
More than once I have cancelled trips with my wife and lost money because a project wasn't finished. It was my form of punishment for missing a deadline. The good news is I am much better at time planning these days.
I like the whole attitude that surrounds the "Do the deal, get a check, take a vacation" process as the core of the reward process.
Yesterday, I wanted to go play for a few hours. I made that activity my "reward". I then looked at my "to do" list and picked a half dozen items. When they were done I could go play. I ended up doing three more "while I was at it", and still made it out where I wanted to go and had a great afternoon.
I could have sat at my desk for hours doing busy work, but instead I assigned a reward, picked the work that mattered, got it done and then headed out for reward. You can't do this in an hourly job in an office. Interestingly, the "Reward Challenge" is the only thing I like about the show "Survivor".
My entire staff is set up on a similar program. All projects pay a set bonus, so if they can get it done quicker, bonus. If they rush it, and have to do it twice, punishment, they did it twice.
No rewards until there is accomplishment. Want a soda, clean the kitchen, want to sit on your patio with a beverage, weed the beds. Make it a little game if you have too. It will help you self start, get more done and be the person everybody wants around because you get things done.
Monday, September 9, 2013
What Is The "Paradise" You Are Seeking?
A few months back, my wife and I took a class from another coaching couple, a very nice husband and wife team. I take these classes two or three times a year and they can cost several thousand per class.
Sometimes I end up finding it a waste of money and other times picking up a tidbit that I didn't understand and can now use to help my own clients.
Over the years I have had several clients who clearly needed help that I didn't feel I could help, so I am always looking to improve my understanding so I can help more people do better.
The burning questions for me are: How come everyone doesn't want to be successful? How come everyone who wants to be successful isn't? How come some people make success look so easy?
Walking in to this class I wondered if it would help me understand more than any other? I always think this walking in the door. Attending two or three seminars every year, I get some good techniques about 50% of the time. Rarely do I gain any more understanding.
This class was different, the teachers gave me a huge question to answer. The class didn't give me any new understandings. What it gave me was a new way to ask my questions.
I agreed with 90% of everything the presenters said. It was the last 10% that got to me. Their premise was very much oriented in "Eastern Philosophy". Many traits of Buddhism were taught, but then he said something to the effect of, "Meditation is a waste of time". I just thought to myself "You are doing it wrong".
Many people meditate without knowing it. A very successful CEO I met once told me that no matter how bad things got at the office, he would jump on his Jet Ski, and go as fast as he could around the lake. When he got back he had all of the answers he needed and his world was right. He was meditating at 70 mph on water with no helmet. The front of your mind needs 100% of its focus to keep you alive, so it can't mess with the real thinking in the back. This was a great insight at the time.
My motorcycles did the same for me many years ago, today it is surfing.
The last day of the three days that was supposed to bring the class together is where it fell apart for me and several others who approached me afterwards.
The teachers tried to tell us that we were all seeking a "paradise" that doesn't exist any longer. That paradise was the perfect world we had from birth until we became aware we existed. The point where we stopped "being". They claimed paradise was lost forever and wan unobtainable and therefore why we were so unhappy.
In our infantile paradise, everything we wanted was taken care of my other people while we were "being". In the lead teachers words, being 100% cared for by others is "Paradise", and one that you can never achieve. You want food, it is right there, you want sleep, you just do it. A perfect world we can never get back.
The teachers tried to tell us that we were all seeking a "paradise" that doesn't exist any longer. That paradise was the perfect world we had from birth until we became aware we existed. The point where we stopped "being". They claimed paradise was lost forever and wan unobtainable and therefore why we were so unhappy.
In our infantile paradise, everything we wanted was taken care of my other people while we were "being". In the lead teachers words, being 100% cared for by others is "Paradise", and one that you can never achieve. You want food, it is right there, you want sleep, you just do it. A perfect world we can never get back.
Given the First Lady's staff, I think she is pretty darn close.
Actually I was still with him and so was the entire class, but then he leapt right over an area that I had been talking about for years and went straight into success techniques. The problem I had, and several people discussed afterwards was that chasm between being and success. If there is no "Paradise" what are we working so hard for? If we are just "being", then why are we suddenly talking about all this "getting and doing"? What is the connection? What is the reason? Why?
I have touched on this new set of questions a couple of times already, but I haven't had a clear answer I could communicate until now. It has been bothering me because there have been people that I couldn't help and I didn't know why. Now I think I do. I also understand very clearly my angst and frustration with my business and life in Texas. My wife calls it our "experiment" and she is right.
While I agree with the seminars coaches that the "paradise" of our infancy can never be revisited, I do think there is a paradise we can achieve in little bits. I also think that we can find a purpose for our journey through life other than simply "being" here.
It is the definition of "paradise" and how we were raised as children that makes the difference. His description of his childhood fits this pattern of having a limited view of paradise. I will use living in paradise interchangeably with living happily. Yes you are allowed to be happy most of the time.
It is the definition of "paradise" and how we were raised as children that makes the difference. His description of his childhood fits this pattern of having a limited view of paradise. I will use living in paradise interchangeably with living happily. Yes you are allowed to be happy most of the time.
Follow me on this one, because it begins to explain a lot.
A child who is raised with a lot of "responsibility" and "reward", has lots of little "paradises" to seek. Being the oldest boy in my household, I had the most of both. All of those little rewards are my "paradise", achieving things makes me happy. Seeing things not happening makes me stressed and unhappy. Think of it as a giant jig saw puzzle, and each reward is a piece that makes a picture of my paradise.
95% of my rewards revolved around life in Southern California. My mother was born here, my father was born here and his father too. Texas didn't work like I hoped because my "rewards" and therefore "paradise" weren't there, they were here in Southern California. Texas people were great, the lifestyle was fun, but it wasn't my "paradise". I couldn't do what I wanted to do, and things didn't get done in a way that made me happy. The old dog wasn't ready to learn new tricks.*
Each time I got a reward for doing good work, I added a new piece to my jig saw puzzle of paradise. For kids who didn't get that many rewards, they don't have a good picture to look at. I think this makes it harder for them to create purpose. For them "being" is an easier answer. This is where a real mentor or coach can make all of the difference in the world. A mentor can build rewards for adults that can become their paradise.
Of course we had punishment in my house too. It would make a great study to figure out the perfect number of rewards and the reward/punishment ratio that successful people grew up with.
The more business owners that I work with who see great change, the more I find they had this responsibility-reward cycle in their house as a child with a very stern, fair and seldom used punishment. My wife really didn't have much of either reward or punishment, so she is much more centered than I am. She is closer to "being" than I can ever be in the way the class was being taught.
One of the problems many business owners face in business is that the customers don't always reward like parents did. Do a great job, get a great check doesn't always happen. The trick that I have started teaching and using myself is finding little rewards along the way that build up to bigger ones as the person achieves greater success. Very smart companies have figured this out and reward employees well. Look at the millionaire list at Apple, Cisco and Microsoft. The success of the company created success for the employee.
I touched on this topic a little bit in the book "So, Now What?" and will do so in much greater depth in the next one. There is also a better version of "being" when you have a good understanding of your wants, don't wants and challenges.
The best rewards in my "Paradise Puzzle Picture" were the time and love of my parents. Get good grades, go flying with Dad. Mow the yard, get a Tastee-Freez with Mom. Keep your room up for a month go to Disneyland. Punch your brother, one good swat and no ski trip.
I realize now this is why I am a self starter. I have projects running all the time and at the end of each one is a little (or big) reward.
I may not live in "Paradise" every day all the time, but I have a life I want to live and look forward too every day. That sounds like happiness and paradise to me.
If you have kids, what can you do to help them build their "Paradise Puzzle Picture"?
If you want to improve your life, use the "Want, Don't Want and Challenges" white board exercise to help you find those puzzle pieces and eliminate the puzzle pieces that someone else gave you or you just don't want.
Finally, build your picture of paradise, and your list of little rewards, big rewards and goals. You will find that you get more done than you ever thought possible and you'll have fun and feel good about doing it.
*Another author recently said "Once you live at the beach, you can never not live at the beach".
Finally, build your picture of paradise, and your list of little rewards, big rewards and goals. You will find that you get more done than you ever thought possible and you'll have fun and feel good about doing it.
*Another author recently said "Once you live at the beach, you can never not live at the beach".
Wednesday, September 4, 2013
How Are The Best Pilots Made? Are They Really Fearless?
With the recent accidents in the aviation industry, a lot of my business clients and actor friends have been asking the same question, "How?". Occasionally I'll get "Why?". No one has ever asked what the key to success is when things go wrong as a pilot. The real keys of success are universal and simple.
Without being part of the accident investigation team, it is really tough to answer about any of these incidents directly with any authority. That said, there are some common threads in pilots, business owners, realtors and actors that can help identify the best among any of those groups.
One of the biggest debates in pilot circles is of course the military v. civilian trained pilots. At the end of the day it really depends on the kind of flying you want to do. There are military trained pilots who have never flown a single engine airplane who would be dangerous doing it and there are civilian pilots who have never been in a spin or supersonic or even upside down who would be equally dangerous doing any of those things.
Either of them could be trained to accomplish the tasks over time. Recently I went out for a flight review in a small airplane and the 20 year old flight instructor asked a great question. She said "Why do all of you airline guys fly like this?" referring to my quick adjustments to the flight profile.
The explanation I gave fits the Asiana Airlines accident at SFO. Think about it like comparing a bus to a skate board. When a bus gets moving it is very hard to stop. A skateboard is easy. When you are flying an airplane that is well north of 100,000 pounds at landing, and up to 1 Million pounds like the new Airbus 380, the same rules apply. If it begins to decend faster than you intend and you don't correct quickly, it builds momentum in a direction you don't want it to go. Imagine that bus now going down hill and you have to stop it. It needs a lot more brakes, and the faster it gets going the harder it is to stop. You can always jump in front of a skateboard and stop it with one foot.
And, oh by the way, brakes on the bus can fail, that is why there are "runaway truck ramps" along steep mountain roads.
You can always treat the skateboard like the bus by correcting quickly and aggressively. It might not be the most comfortable ride for people who aren't used to it, but is is safe. That is basically what I was doing. You can't ever treat the bus like a skateboard or it will simply run you over.
The other reason is that big jets don't just get power like a car or a bus. If you are fast and let off the gas, it takes several seconds for those big engines to slow down. On the flip side if you are slow, which is usually more dangerous that being fast and you need to add power, it may not happen for several seconds.
This also might explain a little bit about the Southwest Accident at La Guardia. We know they got off the path, and instead of acting quickly and decisively to stop the approach and try again they tried to "save it". That extra half second might have allowed enough momentum to build that the situation became unrecoverable.
So what is the common thread and who are better pilots?
What I have found in 30 years of flying both military and civilian is the exact same thing that I have found in business. The successful pilots (and business owners) have learned to push the envelope and even go outside of it a little and then live to tell about it. (If you don't know what it means to push the envelope, read the last paragraph and come back.)
More importantly when they live to tell about it, they gained some respect for that corner of the envelope, and they didn't become afraid of it. That is what separates the great from the good from the average from the marginally safe. The great took a risk, went over the limit and learned to respect the limit without becoming fearful. More importantly they keep doing it along different edges of the envelope and continue to build respect for the envelope. If you have respect you have understanding. Knowledge of the actual numbers isn't required when you have a true understanding.
If you leave the envelope and don't get understanding, you have to go do it again until you do or you learn to fear the edge instead of respecting the edge. Fear is a paralyzing emotion which is dangerous in flying and in business. Doing nothing when you go over the edge will almost always be catastrophic.
How does this apply to business?
The housing market is one of the greatest examples in business. How many people do you know that used to be "real estate investors"? If you talk about buying homes to create rentals, the fear mongers will crawl out of every corner in the room and call you on the phone at the same time.
They will tell you horror stories of bad tenants, crashing markets and the like. Instead of respecting the need to prescreen tenants, or do market research and buy right, they tell you to stay away from real estate investing and be afraid.
If you want to start a business, people will tell you about the countless hours you will have to work for free, they'll say things like "four out of five businesses fail in the first year". Again, fear has taken over their perspective.
When you learn to respect the rules of the game and not fear them, you will find success. I only said success was simple, I didn't say it was easy.
The Envelope -
The phrase "outside the envelope" comes from charts and graphs that engineers use to plot an aircrafts performance. Many times these charts look like an envelope back turned at an angle.
Flying the numbers "inside" the envelope will keep the airplane flying safely in 99.99% of all situations. Many people never even get close to the minimum or maximum capability any more. In Flying for example, when I learned to fly as a civilian and again in military pilot training, spins were required. Spins are outside of the envelope.
Without being part of the accident investigation team, it is really tough to answer about any of these incidents directly with any authority. That said, there are some common threads in pilots, business owners, realtors and actors that can help identify the best among any of those groups.
One of the biggest debates in pilot circles is of course the military v. civilian trained pilots. At the end of the day it really depends on the kind of flying you want to do. There are military trained pilots who have never flown a single engine airplane who would be dangerous doing it and there are civilian pilots who have never been in a spin or supersonic or even upside down who would be equally dangerous doing any of those things.
Either of them could be trained to accomplish the tasks over time. Recently I went out for a flight review in a small airplane and the 20 year old flight instructor asked a great question. She said "Why do all of you airline guys fly like this?" referring to my quick adjustments to the flight profile.
The explanation I gave fits the Asiana Airlines accident at SFO. Think about it like comparing a bus to a skate board. When a bus gets moving it is very hard to stop. A skateboard is easy. When you are flying an airplane that is well north of 100,000 pounds at landing, and up to 1 Million pounds like the new Airbus 380, the same rules apply. If it begins to decend faster than you intend and you don't correct quickly, it builds momentum in a direction you don't want it to go. Imagine that bus now going down hill and you have to stop it. It needs a lot more brakes, and the faster it gets going the harder it is to stop. You can always jump in front of a skateboard and stop it with one foot.
And, oh by the way, brakes on the bus can fail, that is why there are "runaway truck ramps" along steep mountain roads.
You can always treat the skateboard like the bus by correcting quickly and aggressively. It might not be the most comfortable ride for people who aren't used to it, but is is safe. That is basically what I was doing. You can't ever treat the bus like a skateboard or it will simply run you over.
The other reason is that big jets don't just get power like a car or a bus. If you are fast and let off the gas, it takes several seconds for those big engines to slow down. On the flip side if you are slow, which is usually more dangerous that being fast and you need to add power, it may not happen for several seconds.
This also might explain a little bit about the Southwest Accident at La Guardia. We know they got off the path, and instead of acting quickly and decisively to stop the approach and try again they tried to "save it". That extra half second might have allowed enough momentum to build that the situation became unrecoverable.
So what is the common thread and who are better pilots?
What I have found in 30 years of flying both military and civilian is the exact same thing that I have found in business. The successful pilots (and business owners) have learned to push the envelope and even go outside of it a little and then live to tell about it. (If you don't know what it means to push the envelope, read the last paragraph and come back.)
More importantly when they live to tell about it, they gained some respect for that corner of the envelope, and they didn't become afraid of it. That is what separates the great from the good from the average from the marginally safe. The great took a risk, went over the limit and learned to respect the limit without becoming fearful. More importantly they keep doing it along different edges of the envelope and continue to build respect for the envelope. If you have respect you have understanding. Knowledge of the actual numbers isn't required when you have a true understanding.
If you leave the envelope and don't get understanding, you have to go do it again until you do or you learn to fear the edge instead of respecting the edge. Fear is a paralyzing emotion which is dangerous in flying and in business. Doing nothing when you go over the edge will almost always be catastrophic.
How does this apply to business?
The housing market is one of the greatest examples in business. How many people do you know that used to be "real estate investors"? If you talk about buying homes to create rentals, the fear mongers will crawl out of every corner in the room and call you on the phone at the same time.
They will tell you horror stories of bad tenants, crashing markets and the like. Instead of respecting the need to prescreen tenants, or do market research and buy right, they tell you to stay away from real estate investing and be afraid.
If you want to start a business, people will tell you about the countless hours you will have to work for free, they'll say things like "four out of five businesses fail in the first year". Again, fear has taken over their perspective.
When you learn to respect the rules of the game and not fear them, you will find success. I only said success was simple, I didn't say it was easy.
The Envelope -
The phrase "outside the envelope" comes from charts and graphs that engineers use to plot an aircrafts performance. Many times these charts look like an envelope back turned at an angle.
Flying the numbers "inside" the envelope will keep the airplane flying safely in 99.99% of all situations. Many people never even get close to the minimum or maximum capability any more. In Flying for example, when I learned to fly as a civilian and again in military pilot training, spins were required. Spins are outside of the envelope.
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
Finish One Thing At A Time To Succeed
This week has proven quite interesting in all areas of my work. Like most entrepreneurs, I am a little ADD or ADHD or something like that. My mind is always spinning at all hours of the day and night. I got up at 3am this morning with ideas just pouring out.
I met two different business owners who had the exact same problem. They had major projects somewhere between 70 and 80% complete and we already looking to the next project. The problem was they weren't finishing the ones they already started. Do you know anyone who has trouble finishing a project?
If this is you or someone you know, you might like to know why this happens. To begin with we start projects for a couple of reasons. One of them is to prove we can do it. The problem here is that you don't actually need to finish the project to see that you can. When this happens, you get bored, realizing that there is no question that you can finish, and you start looking elsewhere.
The problem I have with this is that you can't win until you finish. This is true in life, racing and projects. Imagine if you got on my flight to Dallas and we went 80% of the way and got on the PA and said "OK folks, you have seen that we made it this far, and we are sure you all believe we can make it the rest of the way so we are stopping in Austin so we can go do something else." Crazy right? And yet we do it every day.
Following through on a project or task until it is completed isn't easy. Anyone can enter the race, and many can run a lot of laps. Only a few will finish, and only one will win.
When these business owners come to me short on patience, money, time and focus while looking at the next project, it is easy to see why they are right where they are.
Imagine if I were a real estate investor and I kept buying property. First I bought a condo, cleaned it up, got it ready to rent, and said "See, I can be a condo landlord" without ever actually renting it. Then I went and bought a house, cleaned it up, got it ready to flip and said "See I can flip a house" without ever selling it. I would go broke doing this, and this is exactly what I see business owner after business owner do over and over.
I must admit, I have done it too.
So what is the solution? The simple solution is not to start a new project until the old project is truly complete. Simple yes, obvious yes, easy, no. If it were easy, everyone would do it.
One of the keys to success is knowing what you want to do before you start, and then finishing it before you start something else. I can't fly a jet while I am still racing a car. Why do we try to start one business when the first one still isn't complete?
If you start, commit to finishing before moving on, and you will see your success sooner than you think possible.
Sunday, July 7, 2013
The Importance Of "The Mind" When It Comes To Success
Earlier this year, I ended up face to face with some deeper challenges both in business and in my personal life. I hit a road block and it looked like I might be hitting a peak in my business. Eventually I figured out that the road block was in my mind. Quite simply, I had become comfortable with where I was.
The bad news is customers could see it, and that isn't good for business.
Once I dug in and found the source of this belief and why I wanted to stay comfortable, I was able to remove it and move on.
Last weekend I took a workshop from another coach whose business is strictly actors. The key difference was that I wasn't teaching, and my wife paid attention. You see, I learned a long time agot that teaching her was a mistake. She doesn't want to learn from me.
That lesson has been a tough one overall in fact. Trying to teach people who don't want the lesson is a total waste of time, and just irritates people. Thankfully I have accomplished the first step of the twelve step program for being addicted to trying to help. If you don't ask, I won't likely offer help unless you are paying me to do it. Then I feel obligated until you say "Stop".
For the rest of the month, I will be sharing some insights and information that hasn't made it into any of my books yet. All of the information will be focused on "the mind" and how it can be a key to our success, or the road block that keeps us in our comfort zone.
If you are interested, come back at least once a week, and let me know what you think.
The bad news is customers could see it, and that isn't good for business.
Once I dug in and found the source of this belief and why I wanted to stay comfortable, I was able to remove it and move on.
Last weekend I took a workshop from another coach whose business is strictly actors. The key difference was that I wasn't teaching, and my wife paid attention. You see, I learned a long time agot that teaching her was a mistake. She doesn't want to learn from me.
That lesson has been a tough one overall in fact. Trying to teach people who don't want the lesson is a total waste of time, and just irritates people. Thankfully I have accomplished the first step of the twelve step program for being addicted to trying to help. If you don't ask, I won't likely offer help unless you are paying me to do it. Then I feel obligated until you say "Stop".
For the rest of the month, I will be sharing some insights and information that hasn't made it into any of my books yet. All of the information will be focused on "the mind" and how it can be a key to our success, or the road block that keeps us in our comfort zone.
If you are interested, come back at least once a week, and let me know what you think.
Monday, May 27, 2013
The Power of Direction aka Getting More Done In Less Time
With the right direction you can get a lot more done in a lot less time. At least that is what I have been saying and writing about for many years. So yesterday as I was running off to one of my four "jobs", and a neighbor stopped me. I could see the question before he asked it. "Isn't it a little hypocritical that you have four jobs and call yourself a focus coach?"
Without question on the surface it looks a little odd, but I have a couple of secrets that I will share from my current book project, and a little perspective to boot.
My four jobs aren't the only things that I do. I also have written books, edit websites and write articles outside of my blog. Also, my house is a giant toy store for big boys. Classic rag top car, surfboard, paddle board, four beach bikes (everyone that visits likes to ride the beach path), skateboards and a radio controlled helicopter. I like toys, and yes they are for many people a distraction to getting focused. That is because they use them wrong.
Focused Doesn't Mean No Life.
Being focused simply means that you can see where you are going, you have a "destination" as I like to call it, and you are making progress. It doesn't mean you are stuck in front of a computer for thirty hours at a time. Writers block is famously cured by leaving the writing office.
As a former military competitive marksman, I used to say you could see your target clearly. When I moved back to the west coast, I realized two problems with that metaphor. First, any competitive shooter knows that you don't focus on your target. The front site right in front of you is the focus. Second, not enough people on the west coast have guns, and if they do, not enough are technically proficient at shooting to understand the metaphor.
The truth is, shooting is still a great metaphor for life. Looking at the front site is like looking at what you have right in front of you. The tools you have today, here and now are what you have, nothing more. Seeing a blurry target is also a great metaphor, because life is a little blurry. Those who get things done know exactly what they want to do, just like a shooter knows exactly what he is shooting at. At least that is true for a successful shooter, just ask Dick Cheney about now knowing what you are shooting at.
So now I use my second life to teach focus. As a military and airline pilot, we never start the jet without a mission or a destination. Hopefully in the military you accomplish both. Starting out, I don't always know what the place I am going to looks like. Every place I have ever been is new at least once. Some change making them new again. I know enough to get there, and have a plan. I also have a backup plan in case there are obstacles that are too big for my current plan.
The first time a pilot goes to an airport, he has no idea what it looks like, yet thousands of times every day pilots land safely at new airports hundreds or thousands of miles from where they started.
So how does all of this relate to the power of direction and getting more done in less time?
When you have a direction, or a destination, you have a reason, a purpose, an intention or a burning desire to get there. If you want to get there bad enough you will.
The problem for most people is distraction. Those little daily fires that pop up. My two dogs are sitting here staring at me waiting for a morning walk. Because of my burning desire to move my business forward and help more people, the dogs have to wait, and I keep typing.
See if this sounds familiar in any way.
Saturday morning you are going to sit down and re-write your resume so you can get a big promotion or move to another company. You get up, and the kids want to have breakfast. You tell yourself, just after breakfast, you'll sit down and fix your resume.
After breakfast, your spouse reminds you that Jonny has baseball and Janie has ballet and you promised Janie you would take her. Not wanting to let your child down, you take her to ballet. You can do the Resume when you get back. After all it is just a couple of pages and the old one isn't that bad is it?
After ballet the other parents are going to have lunch at that new girls store across town, and Janie is screaming to go. So you do.
At 3 pm you finally walk in the door dog tired of running all over town when you are told, the Jones want to get together for dinner, the sitter arrives at 5 and the dog needs a walk and the dishes need to get done, which would you like?
At 9:30 you get home from dinner, tuck the kids in, sit down and realize it is 10:30. Tomorrow you'll get to your resume.
Sound Familiar? Even without kids this has happened to me more than once.
Building a business isn't any different, you can map out a business and plan it down to the exact color blue on your business cards, and wake up a month later with a great plan and no business, or a business with no income.
The Secrets
My first secret to keeping sane with four jobs is that I don't have children. Just two dogs. It isn't by choice, it just is my life. Any parent will tell you that having kids is a job on it's own. Many parents are overwhelmed by the kids and make excuses to get out of the house that make things worse not better. This isn't really a secret, but it is something you need to understand as you set out on your journey if you want to stay sane.
My second secret comes from the ability to harness that internal desire. It takes a lot of practice, and a litte discipline. Each of my four jobs only gets one major item for the day. The reality is, if I focused on just one job*, I would make a lot more money at it. I have made the decision based on my white board to create dozens of small streams of income rather than one large one. You have to make that decision based on your own "wants" and "don't wants"
The flying job at the airline often gets none. The advantage of that job, for the most part is when I am not flying I don't have to think about it. With over 25 years of flying in the military and the airline, flying is now second nature. All jets are basically the same after a while.
Even if you have kids and a day job, you can pick one major goal and make a destination out of it. If your family understands where you are going, why it is important to you and how it helps them, they will understand the next part. I suggest the white board method for this.
The next part is setting priorities every day. Each day at the end of the day I look at the small white board in my office. Not the big one in the garage that has my "Wants" and "Don't Wants" on it. Here too are three columns. The first is the daily task list. One major item for each of my four main "jobs". The second is my Open or Follow up list. Sort of my brainstorm of things that should become something on the daily task list. These are things I haven't done, and haven't put a deadline on but are important enough not to "dump". Some will get delegated when I find the right person.
The third column is my notes and big picture items to work on when I have completed my daily tasks or hit a road block and need to let my subconscious do some work.
Here is the big secret that takes a little practice. When I get stuck on a task in column one like "Write a New Chapter for Book Project", I focus on it for just 5 or 10 minutes. If I don't see a solution, I tell my subconscious to work on it, and then I either go to the far right column and work on something like "Solar Panels for the roof" or I go grab a toy and play or exercise for 45 minutes. I find that almost every time I do this, a solution will just "pop in my head". Oddly solutions for the other three items on the list show up as well.
Using this method, I work three to four hours a day on three of my four jobs. I believe if you use this method, you can easily start a profitable second career or business in just a few hours each week.
*Because the airline job is union and a straight trade of time for money, none of these rules apply. I can't work any smarter to get paid more and work less than the contract will allow. As much fun as flying is, I do plan to leave commercial flying and purchase a private aircraft in the next 24 months. I will be too young to retire just in case you are thinking that is the reason for 24 months.
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